Sex & Bowls & Rock & Roll - Alex Marsh

(Note to reader: I have THREE copies of ‘Sex & Bowls & Rock and Roll: How I Swapped My Rock Dreams for Village Greens’ to give away and all details can be found at the end of this post)

‘Sex & Bowls & Rock and Roll: How I Swapped My Rock Dreams for Village Greens’ is a rather amusing tale of a man who gives up the rock ‘n’ roll dream… to play bowls.

“Alex Marsh wanted to be a rock star - but it didn’t work out. Instead he toiled away in the big city - only to give up his career, move to rural Norfolk, and become a househusband.

But he isn’t a very good one.

Whilst his pride won’t let him admit it, he struggles with the cooking, the housework and the isolation. He hires a cleaner without telling his wife, his repertoire of baked potatoes exhausts quickly. He becomes hooked on daytime television and computer solitaire. He is in danger of becoming weird.

So he takes up bowls….”

Join Alex as he takes his reader through a village bowls team season and somehow makes a rather unfashionable pastime appear almost sexy and cool (note the ‘almost’). But this isn’t all about lawn bowls, oh no, this is the true story of a man who is struggling to deny his inner rock-god desires. But will Alex ever be a rock-god? And will Alex ever have the domestic skills of Delia?

‘Sex & Bowls & Rock and Roll: How I Swapped My Rock Dreams for Village Greens’ is one man’s rather delicious story of self-discovery (sort of). You really should give it a read.

You can buy ‘Sex & Bowls & Rock and Roll: How I Swapped My Rock Dreams for Village Greens’ here.

Asking Alex:

Where did you get your inspiration for ‘Sex & Bowls & Rock & Roll’ ? And is it all true or a little bit made up? It came from one of those ‘funny how life turns out’ moments. I’m intrigued by the fact that I grew up writing songs and playing the electric guitar and thinking ‘I imagine that EMI will spot me soon – hang on, that is probably their man on the phone now…’ whereas just a few years later, I am a sad man who lives in Norfolk, plays bowls and keeps chickens. And I love my simple life immensely – but it doesn’t stop me from reliving this fantasy world.

And yes, it is all true. I’ve read a couple of books in the genre where you can see how an artificial story arc has been shoehorned in – at the end of every other chapter there’s a ‘but I was worried… would I still be able to fulfil my objective of…’ moment. Like on reality TV where there’s manufactured tension because the buildings inspector is due to come on Thursday – will the gantries be finished on time? I was hoping that I’d be able to write something quietly funny that had a little story and mooched along reassuringly.

Who do you feel would be your ideal reader? The evil marketing plan is that anybody who was ever in a dreadful band when they were a wide-eyed teenager will recognise something; anybody who has a hopeless husband or partner or brother or male best friend will sort of cover their eyes and rock back and forth and point at it and shout ‘that’s you, that is!!!’

I will say – I got a lovely, lovely email from a reader who said that the book had made him reassess the whole ‘working at home’ thing, and in particular how loneliness and isolation can drive you a bit mad. So perhaps there is something in there for the stay-at-home worker, housewife or house-husband as well.

So, tell me something super interesting about lawn bowls… It’s one of the only sports where you’re not merely allowed but positively encouraged to take pints of beer onto the playing surface. In our leagues, anyway. True super-interesting story: Governor Arnie Schwarzenegger has just passed legislation in California specifically to allow drinks onto bowling greens, as strict licensing laws have been stifling the game in the US.

And do you have a favourite chicken? One of the speckled ones is laying double yolkers regularly and thus has assumed ‘favourite chicken’ mantel. I am shallow like that.

What do you plan to write next? I’m writing a novel, which I’m excited about as I’m ever so slightly in love with the characters and enjoying spending time with them. Which strikes me as a good start. It’s about an essentially very decent man who gets drawn in to pretending that he’s somebody that he’s not, and… ummm… are any agents reading?

On which reality TV show are you most likely to appear? Thrilling news on that front: I got an email the other day from the producers of the forthcoming series of ‘Britain’s Got Ineptitude.’

Aside from that, unless they revive ‘Stars in their Eyes’ and let me go on as Jake Thackray then I think I’ll stick to writing.

And, finally, (with the skilful smoothness of the finest of interviewers) do you in any way know Simon Cowell? No. Although I once did a one-off quiz that was fronted by a similar legend. It was a bit of a debacle, but did allow me to experience the funniest eavesdrop that perhaps there has ever been: “come quickly – Nicholas Parsons has fallen off the stage!” Does that count?

I have THREE copies of ‘Sex & Bowls & Rock and Roll: How I Swapped My Rock Dreams for Village Greens’ to give away. Simply leave a ‘please pick me’ comment by 3pm (GMT) October 15, then I’ll pop all names in a mug and ask a small child to select 3 winners. This competition is open to all.

*

About the author: Alex Marsh grew up in Essex, a geeky child with a love of electric guitars and the ZX Spectrum. His bands having failed to take off, he relocated to London to get a job, immersing himself in the comedy scene by night. He collaborated on sitcoms that never saw the light of day, supplied middle-of-the-road jokes and sketches to the BBC’s ‘Weekending’ and, following the encouragement of the legendary Arnold Brown, embarked upon a stand-up career that lasted for one gig.

After emigrating to a Norfolk village, he started a blog – Private Secret Diary – written under the pseudonym of ‘JonnyB.’ Written in a punchy, very distinctive style, Private Secret Diary’s little vignettes gained a cult following on the internet and were variously cited in the Guardian, Observer, Independent on Sunday, Mail on Sunday and BBC Radio 5 Live.

In 2010, ‘JonnyB’ outed himself to his readers as the writer of ‘Sex and Bowls and Rock and Roll’ – a comic memoir about a failed rock star who moves to Norfolk to become a househusband and take up lawn bowls. “Alex Marsh’s charming and funny book charts his trajectory through East Anglia armed with nothing but four chords, the truth and some chickens,” said Al Murray. “He hoped he’d die before he got old. It didn’t quite work out that way,” said the original opening to the blurb.

This is the posts comments

  1. Sarah October 12, 2010 at 6:07 pm #

    This sounds like a great book and i would love the chance to win a copy.

    Thank you for running this giveaway.

  2. XS143 October 12, 2010 at 6:12 pm #

    ooooh pick me! pick me! pleeeeeeeeeeeeease! I’m first and everything (for once!) LOL

  3. Laura Westwood October 12, 2010 at 6:17 pm #

    Pick me :)

  4. Valerie O'Riordan October 12, 2010 at 6:23 pm #

    Pick me, please! I love Alex’s blog!

  5. Arnel Aranton October 12, 2010 at 6:30 pm #

    Ohhh!…. A rocker wannabe househusband looking for diversion - a bowls? Pretty interesting… PiCKed Me uP! Pleeeeease or shall I say luck is mine:)

  6. Barbara McGinlay October 12, 2010 at 6:31 pm #

    Sounds good to me, please pick me :-)

  7. Jen October 12, 2010 at 7:09 pm #

    Ooh, this sounds fab - please, pretty please! - pick me. But I will go and buy it otherwise. I’m keen like that.

  8. Ali October 12, 2010 at 7:26 pm #

    Ah, go on. Pick me! Please!

  9. karen October 12, 2010 at 7:27 pm #

    Chickens ,bowls and rock’n'roll what more could one want.
    Pick me please,pretty please with bells and whistles on top.

  10. anne October 12, 2010 at 7:35 pm #

    Oh go on then - pick me.

  11. Postie October 12, 2010 at 7:40 pm #

    I’d like to enter the draw please.

  12. Caitlin October 12, 2010 at 7:43 pm #

    ooo ooo me please! @JonnyB follower here!

  13. andrea tinkler October 12, 2010 at 7:45 pm #

    Please pick me…and i had to laugh at the small child bit…bet its a grown up fella!!!

  14. JonnyB October 12, 2010 at 7:47 pm #

    *checks small print carefully*

    Hmmm… pick me?

    Oh.

    (Thank you so much for your kind words x)

  15. Jase193 October 12, 2010 at 8:03 pm #

    PICK ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!
    It may give me some tips ..lol…

  16. Ruth Hayes October 12, 2010 at 8:12 pm #

    Please pick me - this sounds terrific! x

  17. Elaine October 12, 2010 at 8:19 pm #

    What a lot of Elaine’s but I’m afraid that is my name.
    I would love to read you’re book. I need to have a laugh and it sounds absoulutely great. I moved from North Eng. to Suffolk and kind of know the people over there!
    Please picke me.

  18. Brom October 12, 2010 at 8:53 pm #

    I listened to my nose… and it said…

    Pick Me!

    PS. is that what he looks like… he’s not a bit like the Jonny B I imagined! ;-)
    I’d still read his book tho!
    ooops I’ve just admitted to not buying it…
    yet…

  19. Amanda October 12, 2010 at 10:04 pm #

    Please pick me……please!

  20. _Mrs_Holmes_ October 12, 2010 at 11:39 pm #

    I am broke.

    Pick meh!

    I have a chicken to read it to before the roast.

  21. Jenny Beattie October 13, 2010 at 1:31 am #

    Please pick me. I’d love to read it.

  22. Mary Mayfield October 13, 2010 at 8:06 am #

    Please, pick me - or at least, my husband, who is semi-retired though not much of a house-husband!

  23. Leela Soma October 13, 2010 at 8:19 am #

    Pick me please!

  24. Irene Jackson October 13, 2010 at 8:28 am #

    please nicely pick me :)

  25. Rachel Green October 13, 2010 at 9:05 am #

    Ooh, my name in the hat please :)
    I followed his blog for ages.

  26. Harry Bastard October 13, 2010 at 11:04 am #

    Pick me, or the puppy gets it

  27. JJ October 13, 2010 at 11:15 am #

    Pick me!

  28. Beth October 13, 2010 at 11:21 am #

    Please pick me.

    I asked you to give me one (the book) and you refused! You already know I have to buy all my own christmas presents :(

    To receive this book gratis would be tantamount to being stroked by the pope.

    bx

  29. Rebecca October 13, 2010 at 11:49 am #

    I would love to read this, please pick me.

    What a fantastic tip to hire a cleaner on the sly. hee hee.

  30. Sarah Watt October 13, 2010 at 11:53 am #

    Omg, it was clearly meant to be - I have literally just finished reading Like Bees to Honey. Now I just need to read JonnyB’s book and my life will be complete…

  31. BucksWriter October 14, 2010 at 9:00 am #

    Ooh pick me please, my father in law would adore this book (and I’ll have a sneaky read first)

  32. Owen Teare October 14, 2010 at 9:03 am #

    You can can pick me if you want, if not I will have to go and buy it cos sounds like my kind of book

  33. Mini October 14, 2010 at 9:17 am #

    Oh oh oh, pick me, pick me.
    I never win anything…

  34. Sam October 14, 2010 at 9:24 am #

    Oh, how wonderful! My husband is just clambering up the sides of a deep depression and is actually considering bowls to get him out of this hamlet we call home. Or try to call home.

    Please consider picking me? :o )

  35. Mark October 14, 2010 at 5:08 pm #

    I’m having a terrible day
    you should obviously pick me
    or pickle me
    whichever

  36. Elliott October 14, 2010 at 8:57 pm #

    Please Pick Me!

    Ex

  37. phyllis ellett October 15, 2010 at 8:07 am #

    please pick me, thanks xx

  38. Lisa bailey October 15, 2010 at 10:26 am #

    Please pick me :)
    Thanks :)

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